Can't help but make a second post today! List 6: leftover food...

Yuck!!!

What's that you've found in the back of your fridge? Who knows - it used to be a block of cheese, a baked potato, a carton of milk, or leftover Indian food. Now? It's a green and black blob of mutating alien life...

So here it is, the list of the WORST things to find in your fridge!

List 6: Leftover Food

10. Moldy cheese - not bad you say? A lot of cheese is moldy you say? Generally, I would agree with you. However, there are some days when you just NEED to have some cheese grilled on something/anything. So you find that block of cheddar, and it's got a large colony on it. No fret, you think, and you start cutting... and cutting... and cutting... and by the time the mold is gone, you're left with a small nub of not-enough-to-grill.

9. Leftover rice - I don't know why, but when rice goes moldy it just smells FOUL with all caps. It doesn't look bad, but when you open the tupperware...

8. Grapes - you bought them two days ago, and stuck them in the fridge intending to eat them that night. Two days go by, so you break them out... and the outside looks fine, so you have a couple, but you know something is wrong. So you part the bunch, and find the heart is a web of mold. Yuck.

7. Bread - not in the fridge per se, but still a problem. You come home from work, and you don't feel like cooking... so you're thinking "sandwich night!" You open the bread, and are greated by the bread-lovers worst enemy.

6. Nightly, homecooked leftovers - this is the catch-all for home cooked meals that you put in with the plan of "I'll eat it for lunch tomorrow" but it turns into a 2 week saga...

5. Vegetables with "the patch" - you know what I'm talking about. You bring them out, and while washing them you notice what I call "the patch"... its a darkish, soft spot on the side. The doubt is going through your mind... so you cut it open, and it's just black and gooey all over. Oh well.

4. Sour Milk - not-the-slightly-over-the-expiration-date kind, I'm talking about the back-of-the-fridge-three-months-past-chunks-of-almost-cheese...

3. Green Meat - You're thinking of a nice ham or turkey on rye. So you open the meat drawer of the fridge. Something smells "off"... and you take out the ham or turkey, and its a sea of green. Nothing, and I mean NUTTIN smells worse than wrong meat.

2. Chinese takeout - I don't know what it is that makes Chinese takeout go so wrong so fast. My favorite dish used to be beef and broccoli (until I became El Vegetariano), but if I left it in the fridge it would go south of the border in a hurry. Something about the combination would make everything go really bad and stink to high heaven. Which leads me to number one....

1. ...anything left in the fridge over a holiday/vacation - You've just scored an awesome vacation. The flight was 20% off, you found the best little hotel on the island, and you're saying ADIOS to the workplace for 3 solid weeks. But the fear creeps in... and the night before you leave on the uber-break you attack the fridge with a fury not seen since General Patton. Milk? Gone. Fruit/Vegs? Tossed. Leftovers? Adios, amigos. Eggs? You better believe it. And you think you've got it all... leaving just the ketchup, mustard, olives, secured-unopened cheeses, and unopened butter. So you leave, you have a great time, you come back... and as soon as you open the door, your nose tells you something is wrong. You open the fridge just a crack... and you are attacked by the artist-formally-known-as-leftovers, The Thing, THE BLOB, in the flesh. And with the resignation of one who has met his/her Waterloo, you break out the chlorox/sulfuric acid/plutonium to blast, clean, and radiate the gunk and smell away...

Until later folks... THE NATEMARE HAS JUST STRUCK!